May 2013
darrynek:
but can bob the builder fix his crumbling marriage
a-pariah:
a-pariah:
why is the female hero so often tomboyish
why cant there just be one like oops i chipped my barbie pink nail polish while brutally killing an entire armada of time traveling ninja pirates
with my hair curler
nvm
found her
fuoco-go:
gendertier:
gendertier:
gendertier:
i jUST WALKED INTO MY MOMS ROOM AND THERE’S A DACHSHUND IN HERE
WE DON’T OWN A DACHSHUND????
????????
okay this dog is so sweet but where is my mom omfg
Your mom has been turned into a dachshund. It’s you’re responsibility to lift the curse.
Your adventure is beginning, my friend.
ronaldreagay:
started from the bottom and i’ve managed to get worse
breadstiks:
it’s physically impossible to fit words into a venn diagram
The artistic life is a long, lovely suicide.
– Oscar Wilde (via vonmoire)
bebroom:
not much discussion of bagpipes on this web site
Cosmo Sex Tip #24534
academicwanker:
during foreplay light him on fire and proclaim “Fire cannot kill a dragon,”
pizza:
katherlne:
can tumblr user pizza stop commenting on every post involving pizza tho
yeah wtf how annoying is that
allons-ydraco:
whatafuckinfamilypicture:
osobigbear:
women give birth they literally have the power to end the human species if they decide in unison to boycott humanity. So men, you should probably stop shitting on women, you have no clue what you’re fucking with.
boycott humanity
Best post in the universe
theweepyfox:
geometricdeathtrap:
So I needed a way to alert the class that I was going to be showing graphic pictures of genitals on my presentation so I decided that putting this on the slide before would work
I want this on a shirt.
phone: rings
me: no
cybercitrus:
People that think they are going to be magically independent when they become 18.
I’m really good at keeping secrets because five minutes later I forget what you told me because I don’t care
sfux:
It’s almost June better start getting ready for Christmas
idk i really like being called cute but i also really like hearing that you masturbate to the thought of me idk
shutupaubrey:
you:
me: